A group of teenagers, one of which is the younger brother of Heather from the original Blair Witch Project, pack up their video equipment and trek into the Black Hills in search of answers. They are joined by a pair of shifty-looking locals that claim to have some inside knowledge. Together they find… the same shit that the first group of whiny dumbasses found. Roll Credits.
I can’t really say what I was expecting. Certain corners of the internet gave me the impression that this new movie had some unexpected twist that took the familiar tale into some new, awesome direction.
Either they lied or this “twist” was so shocking that my mind erased all memory of it to protect itself.
I’m tempted to add a “spoiler warning” here, but aside from one scene I don’t know what I could spoil here.
The main difference between this movie and the original is that this one leaves less to the imagination. When things happen in this movie, you get to see some of it. This is a positive in my opinion because my chief criticism of the original Blair Watch Project is that NOTHING FUCKING HAPPENED. Unfortunately, most of what you see is borrowed from other low-to-medium budget horror movies. Jump-scares of creepy human figures watching from behind obstacles? Check. A looming, misshapen figure chasing someone down a dark hallway? Check. LOUD SUDDEN CREEPY NOISES? CHECK! Unexpected body horror? Mmm, yummy.
The plot also hints at some details about what the witch is and how she/it operates. We learn that the witch is sneaky-sneaky, can imitate human voices, knows voodoo, can drive people crazy by unknown means (probably voodoo), does NOT like to be directly observed (like voodoo), and maybe has some ability to manipulate time (with voodoo?). She might also be a bacterial infection. Or not. That part was kinda unclear.
Unfortunately, these hints never coalesce into any conclusion about who/what/why (or even when) anything is happening in this movie. So just like the main characters in this tale AND the original, you reach the end of the experience with no idea what happened or why.
Was this a bad movie? No. Time, effort, and energy went into this thing, and it shows. What you see is well done. That you have anything to see at all is an improvement to me. But you’ve seen it before. And you’re never sure how what you just saw relates to that other thing you saw ten minutes ago. So, it isn’t a bad movie. What this movie is, however, is UNECESSARY. It is literally the original Blair Witch Project with better special effects and filmed with better cameras.
Recommendation: Pass. If you saw the original Blair Witch Project and any other “jump-scare” movies in the past decade, then you have already seen this movie. Watch it only if you’re bored and it’s free.
Parting Shot #1: No Spoiler… but there’s an unexpected development involving one of those iconic stick figures that is awesome. Had the entire movie been like THAT (plus more yummy body horror) then this would be an entirely different review.
Parting Shot #2: Why is it that nobody in this movie has a gun? This group knowingly heads into the woods where people vanished and nobody has so much as a slingshot? Really?
My first thought when I read the title here was “OH BOY, Eric Hood (the character) is back, and a group of teens is gonna get it in strange but interesting ways.
Sigh, I guess that’s not happening. 🙁
On the up side, movie reviews from you are always welcome. I have not seen this one, and had never planned to. The original was so boring and bad, I had to read the plot on Wikipedia to understand what it was I watched.
Here’s to new writings of all types in 2017.
I liked it for a direct sequal/reboot. Looped it in with the old one a bit, expanded the mythos and upped the ante a bit.
Totally see why some people don’t like it though. The director also worked on Lights Out and Your Next, both surprisingly better then the premise let’s on.